commando K

this is a first.

K and i were in the kitchen doing something, exactly what i cannot recall and is not at all important.

i noticed K was abnormally quiet. the constant chatter that normally streams from his mouth had momentarily ceased.

i looked over at him.

oh...

poopface.

(do your kids do this? they stop, mid-sentence, mid-conversation, mid-bite, mid-whatever and stand, mouth agape, eyes reddening and slightly watery as they strain to fill their pants? )

me: "hey buddy, looks like you have a poop! want mommy to change it?"

K:"no, mommy. i want to stand wiv it for a widdle bit."

this is K's latest thing. he dirties the diaper but then, because he is immersed in some other activity or maybe just doesn't want to be bothered, he prefers to wait a while until the diaper is changed, thus "standing wiv it". i, being the lazy mother that i am, oblige him this very readily.

i returned to my previous activity, happy to have a momentary reprieve.

but then,

K: "oh, mommy! what it doing?"

huh? i glanced up to find K standing confused as he stared at his pantleg.

K: "what it doing, mommy? what i got?"

as he began to walk toward me i saw, suddenly, that little pieces of poop were dropping out, one by one from the bottom of K's blue jeans.

what the..? was his diaper loose? how was this happening?

as more pooplets exited with each step i noticed that the front of K's pants were wet as well.

now this was a puzzle. what kind of crazy diaper experience was happening in those pants?

my mind raced backward as i attempted to recall the events of that morning. what had i been doing when i dressed K? had i been so distracted that i hadn't pulled those velcro tabs tight enough?

i grabbed K to check down his pants. and as another turd rolled to the floor i realized my mistake. it wasn't that i hadn't tightened the diaper enough...

i had completely forgotten to put the diaper on at all.



i guess it's finally time to wash that kitchen floor....